Trust me it’s far more upsetting than it sounds. The dawn grips
its reputation and magnificence primarily because of its crimson and if you
excise its only wings how would the bird fly? What if the flowers lose their
fragrance? What if the sun loses its light? What if a love story loses its
love? What if the morning dew loses its purity? What if the seas lose their
tides? What if the trees lose their shade? What if the snail loses its pace?
What if the Hulk loses its green? What if the Iron Man loses Jarvis? What if
NFS loses its cars? What if a computer system loses its processor? What if a
mother loses her maternity? What if the soil loses its fertility? What if the
summer loses its heat? What if the winter loses its chills? What if the monsoon
loses its rain? What if the beautiful loses its beauty? What if I lose you?
Let me take you to the time when species other than humans
could talk and had emotions. In a certain kingdom, in a certain land,
in the countryside, in a little colony, there lived our hero. He was no
different than any other eusocial insect
belonging to the Formicidae family
and yet he was not similar to any one of them. Unlike the other male ants of
the colony he did not prepare his body just to hook up and pollinate a female
ant and then pass away. He believed that a male ant’s life wasn't predestined
but it was in fact what they chose it to be. When the other male ants chose to breed,
he chose not to be farmed in incarceration to serve some explicit purpose. He
willingly chose to be a warrior and serve the colony as some of the female ants
did.
Seeing him take interest in the happenings of the colony for
a noticeably long extent, the queen had established a soft corner for him
recently and had decided to promote him from being a soldier to a troop leader.
He was perhaps the first male ant in the times gone by, who had stepped forward
and made a choice of not following nature’s traditional convention. His story
was inspiring to other folks of his species and had voyaged across the country
through different colonies. Since the last few weeks he was serving the colony
in the best way imaginable. But alongside this inspiring story of his, there
was another story that was being woven in the past few days. A story of love.
After having joined the army as a soldier, he had fallen in
love with a fellow soldier of his. She was eventually the most beautiful ant he
had ever come across. He had instantaneously fallen in love with her right
after looking at her for the very first time. It was exactly what we call love at first sight in our world. He had
conveyed his feelings to her very divinely and she, after making him wait for a
considerably long duration had been engaged with him. They were the first
couple in the family of ants who were together not just to make love and then
separate but were together for an entirely new feeling. The feeling of love. It
had never been since the establishment of the very first colony that two ants
of the opposite sexual category were together because they were in love with
each other. For a change, this was beautiful.
They were together because they desired to be. There had
been talks and there had been walks. There had been cuddling and there had been
fondling. There had been fights which were resolved at some point. There had
been daybreaks and there had been nightfall, which were all beautiful. There
had been lunches and there had been dinners. They spent their days working hard
for the colony and they devoted their evenings to each other. Their story was
no less than a fairy tale and was celebrated amongst most of the colonies
across the country. Love was in the air. Other male ants were motivated to look
beyond their bound lives and identify female ants as someone more than their sex
mates. Everything was happening impeccably until one day.
It had been precisely two months since they were a pair. It
was their eighth anniversary and he was truly pleased that they were together
for so long. Yes, I know you must be wondering how they could celebrate eight
anniversaries in just two months. Let me answer you. First of all this is my
story and so I can make them celebrate any number of anniversaries I want. And
secondly, as ants have an average lifespan of two to six months, he had decided
to celebrate his anniversary every week.
The dawn had just cracked and the blackness had started to
fade away. He could not sleep much the last night thinking of the recent alterations
in her conduct. She was not as warm as she used to be in the initial days of
their relationship. In fact she had become somewhat impolite. She did not talk
much to him and if she did, the conversation would somehow be led to a dispute
further being led to a fight. And moreover, lately their relationship had lost
the element of romance that it used to have previously. He could feel this. He was
unable to comprehend the reason behind this turn of events but deep down he
knew it that she loved her. He could always see that in her eyes.
Nevertheless apart from all these, he craved to celebrate
the day with her. After all he was the first ant to complete two months of
being in a relationship that involved love. He peeped out of his slumbering shack.
There was no one in the dormitory. “Everyone must be asleep.” He said to
himself. He strode out into the dorm and advanced towards the gigantic common area.
The labour ants were all asleep along the floor of the common area. He had to
land his steps cautiously on the ground without tripping over anyone. With
utmost care he paced onward and was nearly halfway across the hall. “Hey! Why
are you up so early buddy?” asked a labour. He looked around to trace the cradle
of the voice and spotted the only labour whose head was up. “Why are you awake
so early buddy?” he fired back the same question in a controlling attitude.
After having realised that she was talking to no companion labour ant but a
soldier, the labour ant promptly shut her eyes and said, “I have got a nightmare
to finish, sir. See you later.” He smirked. Being a soldier wasn’t that bad
after all. If he had to lookout for the colony all day putting his life on
stake for other ants then in return he would get some respect. At least from
the labour ants.
He was standing on the bank of the love pond. That’s what
she used to call it. It was two ant-miles due west from the colony. Every week
on the day of their anniversary in morning hours before going off to duty, both
of them would meet up near this pond and wish each other. This was not some
kind of regulation that either of them had defined but it had developed on its
own. There are numerous habits that ripen in a relationship which are not
anticipated but they make the relationship beautiful.
A bead of dew fell into the pond crafting ripples which demolished
the reflection of his face for a few instants. He was looking into the water.
He would do this every time and she would sneak in from behind him and he would
see her face’s reflection next to his in the pond. He would smile. She would
smile back. They would look at each other and in no time his lips would be on
hers. And then after the kiss they both would wish each other. He treasured whatever
they had because to him these were the most beautiful sentiments he could ever
imagine of.
The sunlight fell upon the meadow spread alongside the
pond’s bank and the drops of dew on the blade of grass shone like tiny cherries.
The water of the pond ensured a shade of crimson due to the deep red light
which looked blissful. The crickets were producing high-pitched sounds. Birds
were chirping all over the place. A yellow canary was sitting on the branch of
the tree directly above his head. The fusion of the red light of the dawn with
the golden feathers on the canary’s body had turned the picture into something enchanting.
He smiled, looking at all the gorgeous things around him expecting the upcoming
hours to be beautiful in a similar fashion. Meanwhile a massive frog was
sitting on a lotus leaf floating in the middle of the pond, singing something
non-understandable in the eeriest manner imaginable. There was something devious
about this particular frog. Although he was singing continuously but his gaze
kept spinning in all probable directions as if looking for something. He was possibly
out here for his morning breakfast waiting for a fly or an ant. “What! How did
I not think of this? He could be here to eat me up.” thought our hero. Though
he was reasonably far from the frog but he was still bothered about the tongue.
This frog had never sat anywhere near this place in the past two months. It was
the first week of July and the monsoon has just hit the seasonal calendar so it
must be the rains that had brought the frog back from hibernation. He merely
wished that the frog didn’t spot him midst the lush towering green grass where
he was waiting for her. He turned out to be lucky enough.
Two hours had passed away and he was incessantly awaiting
her at the very place but there was no sign of her presence yet. His smile was
slowly being transformed to a frown and the enthusiasm of the day was turning
into tension. He looked around. The sun had escalated further up and the
redness had vanished letting a bright golden shade spread into the sky. The
dawn had lost its crimson. The dew drops were all vaporised and the chirping of
birds had stopped. The temperature had begun to rise. The element of romance
was diminishing as the clock ticked. But what concerned him the most was that
she was still not there with him because she had never been late on any of
their past anniversaries. She hadn’t wished him yet.
Time dragged itself with a snail’s pace. Each passing moment
felt to him like an eternity. He decided to head back to the colony assuming
she must have been in some kind of problem. All along the way his head was
dropped down and his gaze scanned the path he was walking onto. He was unhappy.
He walked past the colony’s front gate and proceeded towards the assembly area.
There were hundreds of soldier ants grouped together awaiting their troop
leaders. He marched up to his troop and stood at the end of the already formed
line. The line which was formed had to be perfectly straight such that when
looked from the front side of the line only the head of the first ant could be
seen. This was a rule which was to be followed very strictly and fell underneath
the disciplinary standards of the ant army. He looked to his right to spot her
in her troop. There she was, at the fourth position from the front. She was
looking straight ahead. He didn’t quite understand this course of conduct of
hers. First she didn’t show up near the love pond and now she wasn’t even
looking this side knowing that his troop would always be on her left. There was
something not on track.
There was still pretty much time left for the troop leaders
to arrive. He disengaged himself from the end of the line and walked towards
her. His heart was beating like a drum set on an orchestra as he neared her. He
was afraid of what she would give as a reason for what was happening since
morning. After having approached her he spoke, “Hi!” “Hey! Good Morning fellow
soldier. How are you doing?” she greeted him with a friendly tone. But there
was something about her gaze. He noticed that she did not look into his eyes
while greeting him. Nevertheless she was smiling and looking at him. He smiled
back at her and said “Good Morning baby! I am doing pretty well. The morning…”
He paused, still looking at her. She hadn’t wished him yet. A series of
thoughts were being fed to him. Why wasn’t she wishing him? Did she forget? But
she had never forgotten their anniversary. It wasn’t something to simply forget.
She wouldn’t ever forget their anniversary. But then why did not she show up
near the pond? What if she is doing it on purpose because she had planned a
surprise for him? It could be this.
But he could not contain his urge to ask her. He spoke up,
“Baby, aren’t you forgetting something?” She was still looking at him but did
not look him in the eyes. “Forgetting what?” she put up a question in response
to his rhetorical question. “We were supposed to meet up at the love pond in
the morning. You didn’t come.” He said. “Oh my goodness!” she exclaimed. “Yes,
I am sorry I forgot.” She continued. “You forgot?” he repeated what she said in
an appalling tone. He was taken aback and could not think of anything to speak
up. He remained silent. She was silent too and didn’t speak up either. He
looked at her. She was looking straight ahead. The gawkiness of the moment was
beyond the confines of his understanding. “Happy eighth anniversary!” he said
in a delightful way, controlling his exasperation. “Oh yes, same to you.” She replied.
This time she looked into his eyes. He felt good. There was something special
about her eyes. Whenever she would look into our hero’s eyes he would instantly
fall in love with her at the very moment, over and over again. He felt complete
from the inside.
“I have something else that I want you to know.” She paused
for an instant. For this single moment his heart pumped way more than the
usual. His antennas stood up straight. “I
can’t do it anymore. I am a soldier and I am not supposed to fall in love with
a male ant or for that matter just even mate with him. I am neither the queen
of this colony nor is this a gamergate colony. Moreover even if I am supposed
to fall in love I have realised that this is not what I always desired. I mean
you are not the one. It’s harsh but sadly it’s the truth. I don’t love you. I
wanted to tell this to you long ago but I could not.” She said. His eyes were
fixed on hers and he did not move at all. He could feel his body turning cold
and a certain eeriness trekked down his spine. He did not like the emotion of
the moment. His feelings were mixed. He felt petrified, wretched, unaccompanied,
an ache in his heart was born and he wanted to cry. But he did not. “What do
you want, a break-up?” he asked her. There was a pause and it was the longest
pause he had ever confronted in his entire lifespan. It was scaring him. Every fragment
of his heart was screaming and telling him that she would refuse and call out
the prank she was playing on him. “Yes I want a break-up!” she said it coldly. “All
soldiers in the line! March now, one-two, one-two…” a sharp but loud voice
filled the entire assembly area. It was the leader of her troop commanding them
to march towards the fields. She along with her troop marched away. He stood
there, traumatised.
It had been two days since she had broken up with him and she
did not try to contact him. He did not try to contact her too but he craved to.
Maybe she too wanted to. It was a pleasant morning and he was sitting near the
pond staring into the motionless water. After what had happened he botched to
do any serviceable task and would just sit idle, quietly. The sky was red and
the birds were chirping. The crickets were singing and the dew drops were
shining. But none of these things could fascinate him like the way they used to
earlier. Gloom was upon him. He hadn’t cracked a smile since then and had felt
sad all the time. He was in love with her way too much to let her go. Why would
she break-up with him? Many thoughts like these would keep troubling him all
the time. He was facing a terrible time and deep inside he knew that she was
facing a terrible time as well but this was just what he felt at heart, not the
reality. He believed that something terrible might have come across her and due
to that she had to end what they had. Although her words were unpleasant and impolite
while she broke-up but her eyes told an utterly different story. He had seen a
shade of sadness in her eyes which very well defined the pain she was going to
abduct after that.
“Thud-thud, thud-thud, thud-thud…” a steady and unified
sound of feet-stomping filled the noiseless surroundings of the pond. It was a
troop heading towards the west of the colony. The western fields was the area
from where the odds of foreign attacks were minimum and so only one troop from
the army was sent there every day. The grasshoppers preferred to attack from
the north-eastern side of the colony because the granary was in the North wing.
A major part of the ant army was deployed in that region to protect the
granary. He ignored the disturbance and continued to gaze into the water. He
looked at his face which had lost its magnetism in the last two days. He tried
to smile. Physically he was smiling but emotionally he was not. A drop of dew
fell from a grass blade next to him into the pond disturbing the stillness of
the water. A series of concentric circles was bred and when the water was still
once again he could see two faces in the water. It was her.
He turned around in excitement and found her standing before
him. The source of the marching sound a few moments ago was from her troop. He
realised that her troop had marched away and it was just him and her on the
bank of the love pond. He looked at her. She was beautiful. Her smell was
intoxicating every bit of the moment. If he could describe her in a single
word, he would call her his life. His heart began a journey, the moment he
looked into her eyes and the very next moment she took his breath away. He was
happy to see her. He smiled.
“See I am not here to re-build whatever we had demolished
two days ago. But on the other hand I don’t want to lose you entirely. I want
us to be friends. I have heard about many couples of other species who turn out
to be great friends after they break-up and…” He spoke up without letting her
finish, “I don’t want to be great. I was happy with the way things were between
us earlier.” His smile faded away. “Why don’t you understand that I don’t feel
like the way you feel for me?” she put up a question, rhetorically. “Well we
should not talk or meet up ever then.” He replied. “Okay fine. Whatever suits
you then.” She fired back. She was firm. She marched towards west where her
entire troop was headed. He looked at her walking away.
Before she could fade out of his vision completely he
shouted out to her and asked her to wait. She stopped. He came up to her. “Will
you do me a favour?” he asked sustaining the dignity of the love he had for her
in his heart. “Yes, say.” She replied. He gulped. He looked at her. Her
expressions were plain and did not deliver anything. He tried to gather every
drop of courage left in his body to say this. “I want you to look me in the eye
and tell me that you do not love me. I promise I will walk away at that instant
without bothering you on this again.” He said. She looked him in his eyes and
her lips moved to say, “I don’t love you.” He face turned pale. “Okay. Do not
stop me, now that you don’t love me.” He said.
He turned away from her and started walking. Tears rolled
down his face making their way down to the ground. He felt a clog in the centre
of his chest. He wanted to cry. He stared at the grass beneath him and kept
walking. His heart was shattered to pieces but he still loved her with all
those pieces. He was hurt for he will not have her by his side ever but she was
the pain that he won’t ever give up. Thousands of memories were being played in
his head thinking about all they had gone through. After all it is really hard
to forget someone who gave you so much to remember. He was missing her already.
He was silent yet he was crying. The dawn was losing its crimson once again.
He felt something soft in his hands. Another hand perhaps.
He turned around. It was her, holding his hand into hers. But before he could
say something, she spoke up. “Yes I love you. I have loved you always and will
keep loving you.” His tears flooded down his cheek and he leaned forward
towards her face. He kissed her and she kissed him back. Their antennas curled
up. It was the kind of kiss that made them realise that they never had been happier.
Deep within they knew that they loved each other with a love that was more than
love.
And yes of course, they lived happily ever after.
